Keeping it Real: Parenting

The last few months have been stressful in the parenting department. Words like psychologist, ADHD, evaluation, tutor, anxiety and a handful of others have been on top of mind. As anyone can imagine, these things make parenting really, really stressful. For any of you that have been here, you know what I'm talking about, and I assure you...you're not alone.

Long story short, the Mini Fashionista has been dealing with some anxiety. She has a hard time focusing on her school work because she is worried about what kids around her are doing. As I mentioned in a previous post, reading and writing are coming more slowly (but they are coming) and she compares herself to others in a detrimental way... often setting high and unrealistic expectations. While she has tremendous self confidence in many areas, she lacks self compassion in others.

If you read the blog regularly, you know that my go-to resource for all things parenting is Positive Parenting Solutions. If you have children between the ages of 2 and 18 I highly recommend checking it out (the Online Gold program is what I recommend).

A few months ago, amidst, the stress and worry,  I listened to a one hour Expert Series in the Positive Parenting Solutions program on anxiety. The podcast was led by child psychologist Renee Jain of GoZen and it was, like all the information on PPS, so incredibly helpful.

A few highlights....

1) Worry is a natural and protective response. It is not bad to worry.
2) Reassuring your child that "everything will be okay" is not a helpful tool to cope with anxiety. Help them by labeling their feelings and emotions.
3) When your child is worried/anxious and you can't think of what to say. "I love you and you're safe" is always a good response.
4) The goal is not to be stress free, but to stress better.
5) Worry is exaggerated thinking. We should teach our kids not to be positive thinkers, but accurate thinkers.

Not only did I learn some great tips to help the Mini (and myself...let's be honest, we all deal with some level of worry and anxiety), but I was introduced to Renee's incredible website/tool, GoZen.
GoZen! provides informational programs to teach kids research-based coping, resilience, and happiness skills using online cartoon videos. The Mini Fashionista doesn't get a lot of screen time, so I knew she'd be up for watching the videos, regardless of the content.

Here's a look at the topics of some of the modules.

We've only gone through the whole program once, but I've already noticed on a number of instances where she refers to the concepts and strategies from the videos, so I know that she's paying attention and really absorbing the information. We will likely start it again in the coming weeks to re-inforce the strategies they provide. 

If you have a child that is experiencing worry/anxiety I highly recommend this tool! So far it has been extremely helpful for our family. Also, feel free to reach out with any questions about how we are using it.