Keeping it Real: When your 6 year old wears your bra to school!

Last week the Mini Fashionista asked to wear "workout clothes" to school. I've encouraged this before given that she has PE 3 days a week and is extremely active on the playground at recess, so it seems perfectly logical. I inquired as to why the sudden change of heart...her reply "I just want to change things up." This is code for "I don't want to tell you, mom!"

She even let me snap this photo of her on our way out the door.

Fast forward to 5:00 p.m. in the locker room after swimming and she instructs me NOT to take her clothes out of her bag. Well, it was too late. I was already midway through the process when I discovered my sports bra in her bag! And she immediately confessed to wearing it to school (insert giggles from her friend in the background who was already aware of the situation). If you look at the above picture you can see the sports bra bunched up around her.

Channeling my best "Positive Parenting Solutions" self I kept calm. Honestly I felt a mix of emotions...disbelief, irritation (that she took something of mine without asking), laughter, amusement...

My biggest question was "why does my 6 year old want to wear a bra?" Her reply "because _____ has one." Someone in her class has a bra, and she wanted to wear one too.

Much like the makeup situation I posted about recently (here), this was an opportunity to draw upon my best parenting skills. Instead of saying "NO, you can't wear a bra. You don't need a bra. You are 6 years old," I decided to handle it differently and in an more effective way.

It's clear that she's curious about breasts and bras and about being a woman. By denying her interest I will only push her to hide her questions and curiosity from me in the future. She didn't ask me to wear the bra in the first place because she "knew I would say no", which I probably would have.... (lesson learned on my end to say "yes" to these types of things in the future).

So here's what I did. I told her that she can have a sports bra, but that she will have to buy it for herself. Because she doesn't have breasts, she doesn't need a bra, and I am not going to use my money to buy her clothes she doesn't need. We looked at some bras on Target and identified that they cost around $10, which is a big portion of her saved up spending money.

I encouraged her to think about it for a week. I told her that when there is something I really want I often wait a week or so to be sure I really want it. I also pointed out that she would likely wear it once or twice, forget about it, and then grow out of it. So maybe it's not the best use of her money.

This has definitely been one of the more amusing and laughable parenting experiences thus far. These moments serve as little lessons for me and the Mini. She's learning about life and I'm learning about how to let her live hers! :)